Regret

Regret is a powerful emotion, but it doesn’t have to be a negative one; if we can use it as an agent of change to alter our perspective and to create a better future, then it is worth all the suffering.

I used to struggle with regret; the list of missed opportunities haunted me. I wasn’t happy with the way my life was heading, and used to dream of the things I’d change if I could go back in time. How different my life would be if I could restart.

It didn’t take me long to realise that this mindset wasn’t healthy. How are we supposed to live in the present and plan for the future, if we can’t let go of our decisions in the past?

Now my aim is to be happy with my lot and not bemoan the events in my life. If something doesn’t go the way I want it to, what use is there in making a fuss. It’s much better to revaluate, take stock, and be ready for the next opportunity that comes around. There will always be another.

I shall leave you with a question that I often ask myself, when I’m stuck and need to make a decision. I hope it can help you too!

What will I regret more – not giving it a shot or taking a punt and it not paying off, leaving me to deal with the consequences?

Advertisements

11 Comments Add yours

  1. Wayne Holmes says:

    Thank you for the honest, encouraging post. Challenging, but encouraging.

    1. M_McKeen says:

      Life tends to be like that sometimes doesn’t it? Thanks for your comment!

  2. I really like this post, Matt! There are so many times when I’ve become really upset with myself when I struggle with something or don’t do as well as I would have hoped. While I think in a way it’s good to get a little upset (it forces us to work harder), you’re right in that it’s not healthy to beat ourselves up all the time. It’s important to realize that we all struggle and that we just have to keep working hard on a consistent basis.

    I’ve also heard that it’s much better to try and struggle than not try at all. This can be difficult at times for me (and others) because of the sometimes extremely high level of anxiety I experience, but trying to accomplish something is better than not trying at all! Great post!

    1. M_McKeen says:

      Thanks B! I couldn’t agree with you more!! The most important thing is that we put in the effort to change the things that we don’t like. Slowly, but surely, we’ll get to where we want to be! 🙂

  3. bagofnerveslady says:

    I hate travelling. I get really anxious. But I just booked a holiday to Budapest knowing that I would regret it more if I let anxiety get in the way 🙂

    1. M_McKeen says:

      Well done, I’m so pleased for you! Congratulations for beating your anxiety on this occasion! It’s these small victories that lead to better days 🙂 Budapest sounds lovely. Is it soon?

      1. bagofnerveslady says:

        Yeah it’s at the end of June. I’m really looking forward to it. It looks like such a beautiful city. The hotel is Thai themed! 😀

      2. M_McKeen says:

        It really does, though I can’t say I’ve ever been. Maybe one day! Oh wow, I hope you have a lovely time! 🙂

  4. This reminder comes at a great time for me…my regrets often just pop into my head during the day, seemingly out of nowhere, and I have to make the choice then and there how to deal with them. Sometimes I “make a fuss,” and get negative, and I’m not proud of those times. I’m trying every day to notice if I allow myself to feel negative and to take steps to turn that around, such as thinking a positive thought about that event. What do you do in the moment if a regret is bothering you?

    1. M_McKeen says:

      I think we all do it, even though we know it’s not healthy. I don’t know why, but for so many of us, we tend to focus on the negatives to every situation. I’m the same. I’d like to say that I try to do the same as you’ve described but that’s not always true. Sometimes I let it get to me. I get consumed by it all. It becomes my every waking thought. It weighs on my mind for days at a time. I try to tell myself what’s done is done, you can’t change the past. It helps, kinda. But I don’t know what else to do in that moment. I guess time is a good healer. :/

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s